They chose Significance
To compliment Morgan’s blog, which was written sooooo well, here’s a little more on our friends that chose significance over success.
Wow. So I’ve been holding back on when to post this blog this week. But I still don’t have the words to express how I feel. Two of mine and Chris’ bestest friends, Kelly and Bobby, are our heroes. I want to praise the crap out of them. But it’s not about them. I want to tell you how proud I am to be best friends with them. But it’s not about me. It’s about giving glory to our creator and seeing how cool life is when someone lives that out in front of you.
Basically, Kelly and Bobby are following God’s voice and giving their lives to a greater cause. They just finished Grad School in special education together (literally, Nov 15th, just finished). They were thinking of having kids in about a year. They’ve been renovating their house in Athens like we were here in Atlanta. They lead a co-ed small group of college students , and then are in a small group of their own, and are a huge part of Athens Church - volunteering for UpStreet. They also teach at a high school with some pretty needy kids - and I know it’s hard for them not to bring "work" home. Anyway, I’m just trying to paint the picture that:
(1) God has totally set them up for this moment and,
(2) Despite being busy like many of us, they stopped and listened when called.
When they called us Sunday to tell us what they might be getting into, and everytime I tell the story, all of our first responses are "Who Else? Who else could be more suited?" It’s true.
Anyway, I could go on and on. But really, what it comes down to is they will need your prayers in the coming days, months and years. And we’ll be doing something for them soon… so stay tuned for that.
I’ll leave you with Bobby’s recap of the life-changing events over the past 3 days:
Hi friends,
Well, Kelly and I are back in Georgia. We got back last night around four in the morning after the most whirlwind 48 hours I have ever experienced. I know that you guys might know some of what is happening, but here are the facts from the beginning:
Ten years ago my grandmother began taking care of a two year old baby girl named Tangy (tan-gee) that was her great-granddaughter and my second cousin. The reason that she was taking care of a baby at the age of seventy was that both her parents were heroine addicts and crack heads. The mother had six other children from five other men, and in the process of promiscuity and unsafe needle use she contracted HIV. So, in order for the children not to become completely screwed up, they farmed out the children to various family members. My grandmother recieved the youngest one. Now, she also did not have the optimal situation for a child, as she lived in basic squalor in downtown Baltimore in the ghetto. But anything is better than living with a crakhead with AIDS.
So, fast forward ten years to last Saturday. Tangy is now twelve, and my grandmother is 80. Unbeknownst to us, things with my grandmothers health had seriously declined over the past few months. She was coughing up blood, and Tangy was basically having to fend for herself as well as take care of my grandmother. Tangy was feeding her, giving her baths, and still going to school and trying to care of herself. Saturday morning Tangy found grandma unconscious in her recliner after a massive heart attack. She died on the way to the hospital.
So, my mother called me Saturday night around eleven to tell me that grandmama had died, and that she was leaving to go to Baltimore to make arrangements, and if possible to bring back Tangy to Georgia. You see, after ten years the family situation has done nothing but gotten worse. The biological father is MIA, the mother is still an addict and pregnant again, the grandfather (my uncle) is an addict, and the grandmother (my uncle’s ex) is an addict. There are no other relatives that are available except some of her older siblings, which are also addicts. There is no one for this girl. So she definitely needed to go with my mom.
However, after hanging up with my mom, Kelly and I began to talk about her situation. My mom is almost sixty. She is a nurse who works odd hours. She is back in college getting her RN. She has a roommate. The more we thought about it, we realized that her life isnt exactly conducive for a child. She would basically be a single mom again at the age of 57.
Then Kelly and I realized something. We have the perfect living situation for a child. I mean we were eventually going to begin a family of our own in the next few years, but if we were honest with ourselves we could easily provide for Tangy now. We have a house with multiple extra bedrooms. We have great jobs with great health insurance. We just finished with our masters degrees, so we had a lot more time now. The more we thought about it, the more we realized we have the perfect situation for her. We could remove her from so many risk factors that were in her life now, and provide for her a living situation that was above anything that she had ever experienced.
At first we talked in jest. A bunch of "what ifs". Then we started talking more seriously. Then we realized that we could really do this. Then we realized that we should do this. I mean, Jesus tells us take care of the orphans and widows. Were we going to take the new testament seriously, or were we going to pick and choose what verses are convenient for our lives? The only reasons we could come up with not to do this were selfish ones. So, after a lot of discussion, a lot of praying, a lot of counsel with people we respected, and a even a fair amount of crying, we made the most life changing decision we have ever made and packed the Jeep at three in the morning on Sunday and headed for Baltimore.
The past 48 hours has been a process of finding Tangy (who was staying with neighbors), talking to relatives (most of who were strung out or high), contacting a lawyer, talking to her school, and packing her things. Thanks to your prayers, we experienced only a few hiccups a long the way. We only had two major problems the whole time. The first occured when the mother and grandmother decided that they wanted to take her. Of course, they were in no shape to do so, and in a very lengthy and candid discussion during my 41st hour of no sleep I convinced them of that fact. My resolve about that was hardened when we went to their apartment outside of Baltimore so that Tangy could say goodbye and saw that there were animals running around everywhere, it smelled horrible, and that she was eight months pregnant and still on crack. The next bump in the road occured when we went to pack her things to leave last night. We got to the row house, and it was horrible. There were cockroaches running everywhere, each room had it’s own distict smell of urine and feces, there were mice and rat turds everywhere, there were no doors on any room, and the only bathroom was actually in Tangy’s room. Just five feet from her bed was the shower, toilet, and sink. On top of that, my heroine addict uncle had ransacked the place with his buddies and stolen everything that was of value. There was no will, so everything was up for grabs to the greediest family members. So, everything was disheveled and desecrated. But we got her packed, took everything that we could fit in our car and that wasn’t infested with cockroaches, and then got the heck out of dodge. We have a lawyer in Baltimore working out the red tape of getting us legal guardianship, and there do not seem to be any more speedbumps in the way.
So, what about the little girl? She is a little cutie, that is for sure. She talks one hundred miles an hour, and is full, full, full of energy. She is just as nervous and excited as we are. She has her rough edges because of her crazy life, but has definitely come out more "normal" than she could have considering the circumstances. She thinks our house is a mansion because she has her own bedroom and bathroom. Last night was her first night ever not being woken up by bums in the alley, or by someone going to the bathroom five feet from her face. Everything seems great so far, but I know that we are in a honeymoon stage, that she will definitely have some mental baggage, and that there is a tough road ahead.
As far as how Kelly and I are doing…well we are doing pretty good considering the circumstances. We are scared, excited, nervous, happy, sad, everything. Sometimes I want to jump in the air rejoicing, other times I want to throw up. It is definitely the craziest thing that I have ever done, and the most sane thing as well. We know that this is a super commitment, but we believe we are more than up to the task. Thank you guys so much for your prayers. We definitely would not have been able to make it without them. Also, we appreciate that many of you have already asked us what ya’ll can do to help. Right now we are clueless in that matter because we are still trying to figure everything out. But we will keep you posted because we know this is something that is bigger than ourselves, and we will be able to use as much help as possible.
Thanks, and we love you guys,
Bobby, Kelly, and Tangy
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I love them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pray for them!
love you. love them. love Him!
Comment by Morgan — December 6, 2007 @ 1:48 pm
God Loves You’all and so do we.
Hold on He’s coming.
mike
Comment by mikesim — December 6, 2007 @ 7:22 pm
I don’t even know them & I’m sitting here crying. So uplifting & really puts things into perspective. Thanks for posting it.
Comment by Sara Hanks — December 6, 2007 @ 11:30 pm
well I do know them…love them…wow what a gift to read that…please let me know if we can do anything..a clothing drive..anything…wow…I am amazed and in Ahhhh of Kelly and Bobby and their obedience!
Comment by gilly — December 7, 2007 @ 11:52 pm